Worst Date EVER

There haven't been many times in my life where I have felt unsafe or scared because of a situation I was in. I have this mentality, like many of us do, that "it" (whatever that it may be) will never happen to me. You always see news stories or hear it through the grapevine that this happened to that person, but never do you think that these sorts of outrageous things could happen to you. Location isn't the only factor, but it has a lot to do with it. Living in New York I should have better prepared myself mentally, but I thank my dad for all of the preventative teachings and countless hours that he sat me down to tell me how it is.

Sometimes as I tell this story I laugh a little; only because I think of how absolutely ridiculous this guy was--he had to be on crack or something. I can reassure you that it definitely was not funny in the moment.


I had been chatting with this guy and we had some things in common, had good conversation, and he seemed nice. When he asked me if I'd like to go to dinner and a movie I thought: "Sure! Why not?" It just so happens that we picked the worst night to go out--there had been a snow storm all day after not snowing in NYC almost at all that winter. I told him I wasn't sure if I'd be able to make it out, so he told me to just take a cab and he'd pay for it. What a gentleman! Or so I thought. We had dinner and drinks, but missed the movie as we got caught up talking. I should have left as soon as he told me how much he used to party and how his family was involved in drugs and blah blah blah. I know, red flag. But for some reason that had "great story" written all over it, and I stayed. Long story short (as far as the rest of the date goes), he got really drunk, may have been on drugs--an assumption based on the amount of times and frequency of him going to the bathroom--and became too handsy. I didn't want to upset him (because you never want to upset a drunk person that clearly can't control themselves) and said I was getting tired and wanted to head home. It was late, the streets were full of snow, there were hardly any yellow cabs out (they take cards), and I didn't have enough cash for a gypsy cab. When I told him that I was just going to take the train he said he'd go with me to "make sure I got home safe." There was no way in hell I was going to wait with this guy at a potentially empty train station alone. To humor him, I said I'd take a cab, to which he also insisted taking with me for the same reason. I argued with him for a couple of minutes about how unnecessary that was and as I tried to walk closer to a main street to see if there were any cabs he grabbed my arm and wouldn't let go. My feet were sinking into the snow and there was no one out--no cars, no people, nothing. Again, he insisted on taking me home in a cab. I didn't know what to do. First things first, I had to get this fool's hand off of me and get to a place that had people. I told him that he could take a cab with me, at which point his grip loosened and I ran into a hookah bar that was a couple store fronts down. He tried to get loud with me, so being the smart girl I am I loudly said that he needed to leave me alone and he couldn't come home with me. We walked outside and I ran to the first cab that pulled up. He had stopped to talk to some men in an SUV and when he saw that I was talking to the cabbie he shouted that these men said they'd take me home for free. I know, clearly my sense of judgment isn't always in tact, but I knew better than to get in a vehicle with strange men that he may know. As if things couldn't get any worse, as soon as I hopped in the cab and was about to close the door his hand stopped it. He told me to let him know when I got home and I slammed the door. By that time my nerves were on edge and I was in tears. I didn't have enough cash to get home, but the driver was nice enough to not abandon me in such a state. The next day he called, left voicemails and texted me repeatedly after I asked him to not talk to me. I finally told him that if he didn't stop I was going to get a restraining order. Needless to say, he stopped.


Now, there are a couple of things I learned from this situation. The first being that I am not as invincible as I thought I was. No one ever wakes up and says: "today I'm going to go on a date with a psycho," so you need to be prepared. The second thing was that my dad does know best. Despite the fact that I tried to tune him out when he repeated his "life lessons" like a broken record player, I am extremely grateful. In times like that you need to 1) remain calm in your thoughts, 2) get to a place that has lots of people, and 3) always be aware of your surroundings. You never know, it could happen to you.