Why people can't handle the truth

Coming to the end of a relationship (any type of relationship) is hard. More than likely, you're going to tell the person the reason you're breaking up with them--like any normal person would do--in hopes that they may become more self aware and change their wicked ways. People always say that they'd rather someone be honest with them than be told a big, fat, juicy lie to spare their feelings. They don't want things heavily coated with sugar or tip-toed around like a sneaky toddler, they want the hard truth. I know I personally would prefer it if someone just gave it to me like it is instead of avoiding me or waiting an entire year to tell me how they really feel as if my time wasn't worth anything. Although people say they want the truth, the fact of the matter is that hearing the truth is hard. Even if it's done with the best intentions, no one really wants to hear the truth.

You're telling people that there's a problem with the way they act, so it looks like you're attacking who they are. You're telling them there's a problem with a situation, so you're telling them that they messed up with the way they handled things and therefore it is their fault. It's never easy hearing that you've done something wrong or that something was your fault--it comes with a very dissatisfying feeling. I've felt it, I've dealt it, denied it and supplied it. The fact of the matter is, the truth can be damaging sometimes for several reasons: 1) the spotlight is being put on an unwelcomed problem/situation, 2) there's the potential of creating a new problem (toying with someone's emotions is never a good thing), and 3) more than likely, a solution or some helpful advice is not being offered as aide to what you did not want to hear. If a solution is being offered, the person may take it offensively and then there's that problem.

When giving it to someone like it is, remember that you're dealing with a person that has real emotions and not just some carbon cut-out, robot freak that used to be your best friend or significant other. You don't want to beat around the bush, but you should be constructive when letting someone know that there's a problem going on. Hey, for all you know, they may be completely unaware and appreciative that you're trying to save them from themselves. Just remember, treat others the way you want to be treated...so let em down easy.